If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
plz talk dirty to me
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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