Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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