Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Randomize