no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
