How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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