sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
