It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
