Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I puked a lego.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize