What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
