So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
