so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I will be naked everywhere
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
