You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize