What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
do herpes really smell.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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