Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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