Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
