just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
