oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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