i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
