After last night, I could never be a politician.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize