Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
