Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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