I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
Farmville is her only friend.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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