We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize