clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
