Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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