guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
It's blow job season.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
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