Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Randomize
