I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
