I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize
