brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
True strength comes from lack of pants
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