physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize