Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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