i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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