i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.