I should be sponsored by Trojan
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Randomize
