guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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