i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
