he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize