Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
True strength comes from lack of pants
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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