Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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