lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
