id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
i think i have herpe
just one?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
