tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
