i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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