Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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