so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Randomize