But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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