apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
