I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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