jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I would fuck him just for his dog
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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