Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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